Sunday, September 26, 2010

Something Positive

Ok, that last post was sort of winy and stuff. I want to post something awesome. As some of you know, I spent much of August traveling. This is a story about one of those trips...the weekend of August 28th. I drove solo, just my, my dog, my golf clubs, 1 bag of clothes and of course my car. I love my car, I love to drive, I love to drive my car. My car is very fast, too fast really, and it handles like a go cart, it's insane to drive. So with all the exhaustion going on in my life after work on Friday the 27th I was able to just get into my car and put my foot into and drive. Corners without slowing down, check. Down shift and pass slow moving vehicles like they were standing still, check. I am able to drive, and love it, on the ride home I would touch 200km's an hour...this is stupid, I am happy I didn't die, and I won't be trying to go that fast again.

I got to 100 Mile House BC in around 4 hours from that trip. Went to my friends parents house where a dinner was going on. I didn't stay for dinner, I just wanted to check in with them, let them know I had arrived, and then talk with them about final preparations for the next days events. Good talk with Mom, shared some tears and a fantastic hug. Went home to my Mom and Dad's house.

It's funny how different life becomes as you get older. I couldn't tell you the last time I was alone with my Mom and Dad for an extended period of time. We laughed, played crib, drank beers, visited. It was really wonderful to just hang out with my folks without anyone else around.

Anyways that night I excused my self and went to the guest room. I had written out what I was planning to say weeks in advance of the service we were doing the next day but I was feeling the need to change a few things. I spent about an hour balling my eyes out and rewriting the dedication I was doing the next day. Prayed for the family and that God would use me and speak through me. Then I slept. I woke up to bacon and eggs...this is camping food on wifey and I's world...a world where bacon is not to be cooked inside...ever...well not ever but needless to say it was a great treat. I ate my breakfast, dressed and bolted out the door for the main event of the weekend.

I got the house, talked with the family, talked with the best friend, asked him to give a toast at the conclusion of my part. Grabbed Jamie's Bunniekins mug from when he was a baby, put it in the blue velvet bag that also held a cansiter containing the ashes of a man who refered to me as "Uncle Shawn." I picked Jamie up, and together with his brother Sean, and his mother Debbie, we walked a beautiful trail into the park in the middle of the town we grew up in.

We walked to a bench beside a river, about a km further up the river is an amazing water fall where I have more memories then I can even begin to count. A stones throw from the bench is the spot where my wife and I first began our relation ship. Across the river from the bench is the tree that a friend from high school fell out of and died. At the foot of that tree is a bench, a bench in his honour. This park is alive with memories from my past.

It is beautiful and unfortunate that we are all about to make another memory. Two years and a few days after Jamie passed away we are gathered to dedicate a bench in his honour and spread his ashes. I wont bore you with exactly what was said. We all cry, we all laugh. At the end of my dedication Jamie's best friend comes forward. Cups are handed out and Ryan speaks a toast to who Jamie is and what his life meant. Sean and I open the bag and grab the mug. We open the container and there is Jamie. I fine dust, not quite white, not grey either. It is an image that will stay with me forever. Another memory at the park. Sean takes a large scoop of his brother and tosses him in the river. The bench is located in a pretty calm spot of water. It takes a few minutes for all of the ashes to be washed away. Everyone is quite, not a sound is made. We cry again, only tears, no sound. People are hugging, and then, fitting with this family, Sean warns us all that we probably don't want to go swimming for a while.

We all talked, laughed, and for some of us, caught up as we hadn't seen one another in years. We played golf, ate dinner, shared prizes, more laughs, lots of great stories about Jamie were told. It was a great night. The next day Sean and I went for a drive, ripped hard on my car, less hard on his car. Then I loaded up and took the solo trip home. I was deep in thought for that entire drive home, and because I had my GPS I decided that I would rather then take the Fraser Canyon for the umpteenth time, I would take highway 12 from Spences Bridge to Merrit, then I would take the Coq to Hope and finally home. I have never drive the number 12 but I know it's twisty, and it's beautiful. It was a rather spirited drive, many amazing corners I was able to throw my car into and out of. I also set a new personal land speed record when I hit the Coq.

Back to the drive on the number 12. This road follows a river, not the Fraser, a smaller river, it is twisty like the river, climbs hills, lots of farms, amazing cliffs. Honestly it is breath taking. As I was driving I was thinking about how amazing God is to make such a diverse world, and that even though I can't understand why He would need to end Jamie's time on earth a month before his 25th birthday I know he had his reasons and that he loves me. I was also thinking about the metaphor of my taking a road untraveled. I had never done a memorial before, 7 days later I would be doing a wedding for the first time, also, I was talking about going back to school. As this was going through my mind I came around a corner and there was the most amazing double rainbow. I love God's timing. Enjoy my horrible picture, and as always...

Thanks for reading.

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